PETA, the organisation behind the infamous ‘I’de rather go naked than wear fur’ campaign, has renounced former supporters Good Charlotte over their recent KFC ad campaign. PETA, which has drawn criticism about its fur campaign over the fact that celebrity supporters still use other animal products such as leather, have finally decided that the band has gone one step too far in renouncing their previous activism for money.
In response to this news the band, which has been busy annoying and patronising Australian cricket viewers, has created their own offshoot of PETA named PETABUM. PETABUM, which stands for People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals unless it Brings Us Money, is aimed at celebrities who want to be seen to be supporting a cause who then may want to immediately drop that cause if there is a profit to be made from it. “We just didn’t like them anyway” Joel Madden said, “This one time I wore a fur coat to a meeting with them, and they got all uppity about it. It was all animals this and tofu that….I just wanted to look cool while I campaigned for them god dammit!”.
PETABUM has already gained a hefty following, with many well known celebrities glad to have finally found an organisation where they can raise their public profile through activism, while still enjoying the benefits of the causes they protest against. Joel has big plans for the organisation, including a mass global concert with many gigawatts worth of light shows and dozens of international plane trips, in order to raise awareness of power conservation and the pollution caused by fossil fuels. Although Joel also says “I think that may have already been done”.
In related news, the announcement that Good Charlotte is moving to Australia has caused a highly hostile reception, with some elements even turning to ugly racism. Some elements of the public have resorted to slogans like “Go home, we’re full”, chants which have commonly appeared amongst the most racist elements of society, particularly suburban Sydney beaches.
——————————————————————————————-
This cricket fan was none too pleased that Joel Madden was moving to Australia, and resorted to petty racism
——————————————————————————————-
The Australian government has declared it will do all it can to keep the band out of Australia, although it has made no promises. “It’s not as easy turning around a plane of illegal immigrants, especially if they are white” Julia Gillard said at a press conference this afternoon. “Its easy to turn back a boat of black people, nobody gives a damn. But when a plane of illegal American and European immigrants turn up, people suddenly become all sympathetic and complain that they should be allowed. But dont worry, we will figure out a way to weasle out of this like we do everything else”. Tony Abbot stated that the approach the government was taking was completely wrong, although predictably refused to state how he himself would handle the situation differently.
——————————————————————————————-
Taking inspiration from their Chinese counterparts, some Australians have built a wall to keep Good Charlotte out. only time will tell if their efforts are more successful.
——————————————————————————————-
The 'Strine 